it's amazing to survive

finally buckling down to write the lesson plans for the evening,

I opened a new browser window

and typed the letters "p" and "a" in the search bar,

causing the web address for Pandora to come up.

I hit enter, 

which took me to the page and station I had bookmarked some time ago, 

my Caroline Herring station.

the first words I heard 

were from a song by the station-title artist

which I had never heard before:

it's amazing to survive.

I immediately switched the station to "Symphonic,"

a stock collection of classical music which I have begun to customize to my own taste.

however,

I paused to take in those words I just heard

(and to open up a new blog post,

as I felt some brief yet serious reflection coming on)

as I realized that these few, four words 

are not so insignificant in meaning.

so here I am.

writing,

pondering,

mulling over that phrase

it's amazing to survive,

as the sounds of Samuel Barber's "Adagio for Strings" resonate through my apartment.

it truly is amazing,

if you think about it,

to have survived through the circumstances and events we each have experienced.

it is a blessing

to wake up each morning

with a new chance to do something, 

anything,

to make a difference.

it is wonderful

to be alive

and to feel 

the pain of hardship

the grief of loss

the frustration of anger

the fear of the unknown

the love of another

the peace of acceptance

the joy of satisfaction

the calm of contentment

the passion of justice

the richness of fellowship

the serenity of being alone.

each 

of these feelings

helps us to understand

that we are alive

and have purpose.

it is important

to be present,

to appreciate that which has intrinsic value

and recognize how extrinsic sources so quickly disappear.

I sit here,

dwelling in personal frustration and self pity,

realizing that 

it's amazing to survive,

that being caught up in the wonder of life is much more valuable 

than dwelling in sorrows,

and life is still very much worth living.